Day Off & An Off Day

Today is my only day off of work this week, and that’s kinda stupid. It’s my own fault because I added an extra shift into my week so I could get some necessary things done. But in all fairness, it was kind of invitable. After a few slower months, we’re coming into our busy period and the extra stuff that needs to get done still needs to get done. And if I didn’t do it, no one else would have. It kinda sucked. No, it really sucked, but what can you do? I still have to work tomorrow, but at least next week is a little more chill, which is a blessing.

On top of working a little too much, I’ve also been feeling under the weather a bit lately. I think it’s probably a combination of a few things. I’ve been pushing myself a little harder than usual at work and at home, I’ve been getting up earlier and no always getting the right amount of sleep, and it’s just been miserable out all the time. I woke up yesterday morning and I didn’t feel the greatest, and then I had to wait outside in the pouring rain and whipping wind for a while after work yesterday. That was not enjoyable. There was no where to hide, either, because the wind was making sure you weren’t safe. Needless to say, I definitely dumped myself into a hit bath when I got home, and that seemed to help things.

However, after climbing into bed at 9:30 to watch a movie, and then falling asleep at about 11, I woke up at 12:30 with troubles breathing. That wasn’t fun. It didn’t feel like allergies, and I certainly wasn’t congested, but it was almost like I just couldn’t get enough air into my lungs. I definitely had some panicking happening because no matter what I did, I kind of felt like I was suffocating, even though I was still managing to breath air in. Eventually it started to go away and I managed to get to sleep. I’ve got a bit of the same problem today, but now I think I can tie it to some phlegm build up, which is gross, but at least I’m not suddenly dying.

In any case, I ended up sleeping in today because I just didn’t really feel like I slept that well. It was obviously needed, and even though I got off to a slow start, I already feel like I’ve had a moderately productive day. I wrote a list of things to do last night, based on my agenda, and I really don’t have that much to do. A lot of what is left is just cleaning up my room/work space because I’ve been letting it slip, and then editing a few things. I’m okay with that. I might even try to get a head start on my editing goals for next month, but with a full night of D&D tonight, there’s a good chance I won’t get there. Also, I’m kind of okay with not pushing myself too hard today. Maybe it’s best to just wrap myself up in a blanket and chill for a while.

Chill vs Productive

I’ve always known that I have a weird sense of what being productive is. Especially when I should be working on my writing or whatnot, and I don’t, I feel like I haven’t done anything. It could be the culture that I’ve grown up in where, if you’re not hitting burnout every few months, you’re not doing it right. Or it could be that, because the economy is so messed up that I’ve had to work like crazy just to try to make ends meet. And then give up and move to a smaller town. Like seriously, I was working over 50 hours a week and things just weren’t working.

When I moved and focused more on writing, I focused less on work. In that I went from 50+ hours a week down to sometimes only four. Big adjustment. It definitely took me a while to figure that out, but in the interim, I focused on working on my writing, and work I did. I put a lot of time and effort into planning and writing, and it paid off. I worked on it every day, and even when I was burning out from the hours spent at my computer writing or editing, keeping house, and getting more hours at work, I was making progress. And that was what mattered. But did it?

The problem I have now, is that I got so used to measuring my success solely on my ability to sit down a write several thousand words, or edit an hour or so of footage. My productivity became tied to my computer and now, when I don’t do work on my computer, I don’t feel like I did anything.

Yesterday, I woke up, edited a vlog, posted here, went to work for four hours and then went on a 5k hike. Other than a short nap and eating dinner, I did nothing else that day. At the end of the night when I was reflecting on the day, all I could think was that I had done nothing. I then remembered that I had done a few things on the computer before work, but even so, as those things are becoming more a part of my routine, they seem less like accomplishments, which I think is bad. Plus, on top of that, I did work and went for a hike. Those are still productive things I did. But they don’t feel like it to me, and I think that’s messed up.

I’ve known this has been a problem for a while, and since the new year I’ve been working on it. I’ve been doing crafts, which I normally wouldn’t associate as something productive, but slowly, as I build up a pile of embroidered puns and Disney characters, I’m starting to feel like I’ve been doing something good with my time. It’s honestly been great for my creativity overall, but I think what’s most important is that I can see it as something worth doing that isn’t so tied to my computer. I’m getting a hobby back, and that is key.

Anyway, I think this is just a really long winded way of saying that I feel like I didn’t do anything yesterday, despite the fact that I did, and that I feel like I had a really chill day. I will admit, I had a bit of a nap, and that was wonderful. I’m currently feeling the need for a nap later today as well, but we’ll see what happens after work.

February Goals

I feel like it’s been quite some time since I sat down and actually set up a writing goal. Sure, I’ve written on my board that I need to add x number of chapters, but that’s not very quantifiable and therefore nothing to get excited about. I think the last time I had a legit goal, with a legit daily word count to hit, was back in November. Incidentally, it was also when I finished my last edit. Well, it may have been December when I finally finished, but it was close. Since then, I haven’t touched my goal board in a productive way.

That changed yesterday.

After coming to the realization that my book needs a lot more work than I was willing to admit, I knew I had to set a goal for next month. I strive on hitting arbitrary number goals. I think it’s because I’m so competitive, that even though it’s just a number on a board, I have to win. Normally when I’m writing, my goal is usually around 2,000 words a day. That’s a low goal because if I’m having a good day, I can do that in about an hour. However, if I’m having a bad day, 2,000 words can take me ages. That’s why I think it’s a good number. It’s either something I will sail through (any therefore likely write much more) or it’s something that I will hate the entire time, so the low goal is good. When I edit, it’s different. The words are already there so it’s just a matter of going through, adding and taking away anything that doesn’t work. I usually set my daily goal around 4,000 for that. Still a fair amount, especially if you get bogged down, but definitely manageable.

The way I pick my goal is usually just by taking however many words are in my book and divide that by the number of days in the month. It’s not complicated. Then I usually make some adjustments if I think the goal is too ambitious, or not ambitious enough. At the current size of my second book, and the fact that February has less days than the normal month, math said that I would have to edit 4,887 words per day to get everything done by the end of the month. That’s a lot of words, and as you’ll notice, above my usual daily goal for editing. This is when I would normally make an adjustment, usually going down so that I can ensure I can hit the goal. I would rather do a little less and hit my goal so I will be continuously motivated. It’s no fun when you keep falling short. So what did I do? I decided to go for 5,000 words a day. Wait, what? Even as I’m writing this, I’m not sure it’s a good idea. Honestly, I often blow my daily goals out of the water anyway. But I guess I just really wanted to challenge myself, which is great. However, I am a little concerned about February.

I work a real job and February is going to be a lot busier than I’ve been used to. I’m working a lot more and so that will cut into my editing time. I’ve also started this routine where I wake up earlier. This will help me on days when I don’t work, but when I do, I think it’ll really cause me to struggle because my hours for productivity decrease substantially, and just have in general as a result of this new sleep schedule. When editing or writing, I used to easily stay up until two or three in the morning to destroy my goals. Now, however, I climb into bed at about ten, which means there’s four to five hours of lost productivity. Granted, I used to sleep in a lot later, but my mornings are accounted for with video editing, so I won’t benefit from that time. I think it’s going to be a struggle, for sure. But I’m hoping it’ll mean I work smart in the time I have. But only time will tell.

The Truth About Book Two

For the last little while, I’ve been struggling with my second book in my series. And to understand a little bit about how I got to where I am in the book, I think we need to go back to the beginning.

When I was originally planning this series, I thought it was three books. I planned it as three books and even moved around where I thought the books were going to split in order to get it into three books. The problem with that was that I barely plotted out book one because I felt I knew it so well, and I did. I didn’t, however, realize how much I wanted to get into that book and my word count quickly ballooned to the ridiculous point. It doesn’t help that I’m also really verbose. I like words and it showed. I think the word count got up to 250,000 give or take. Okay, maybe not quite that high, but it was approaching. I finally took a step back and realized that book one was, in fact, three books worth of content, and that my trilogy was actually a five part series. Whoops! But in good news, I had a lot of the story for the first three books. I think I had about 60k of the first two books and 80k of the third book, give or take. It was definitely a good start.

Book one went off with very little problems. I did a lot of writing and a lot of editing, but overall it wasn’t a terrible experience and it didn’t take me too long. Book two is another story. It is taking me forever. I think I started on it almost a year ago now. Maybe closer to ten months, and it hasn’t been going well. In all fairness, I work away for about three months in the summer, I’ve had deaths in the family, and I’ve moved twice. Those things have definitely thrown off my routine and made it harder for me to be consistent. So even though it’s been ten-ish months, it’s been far from ten months of working time.

The last few months, as I’ve been really trying to focus on this book, have been particularly hard. I finished an edit and then figured out what chapters needed extra love before I went into, what I hoped would be my final edit. I decided to work on the chapters separately so I wouldn’t have to keep switching between writing and editing mode. It was a good idea, or it would have been if the chapters I was trying to add in made any sense. I recently had the realization that one or two of the chapters I was making didn’t make sense with the story progression. They add a bit in terms of world building, but I don’t think they add enough to make it worth it to actually have a few chapters in a row on the subject. When I realized that, I also realized that there was a good chance that the actions of my character in those chapters didn’t make any sense. Last night I decided to quickly go through all the other chapters that needed massive rewrites or a lot of work. But I couldn’t find them. I’ve added so many chapters to this book that my chapter numbers no longer line up with my notes and so I have no idea where those chapters are.

This book has gotten out of hand. And I have just finally realized that. It’s been ballooning for a while and as I add more and more chapters, even though some are very necessary, it’s starting to drag the book down. I put my notes away because there is no way to figure out what is going on, and I had a good think about things.

It’s time to go through and edit again, and edit ruthlessly. If it’s not progressing the story (as I feel a lot of things aren’t) it needs to go. This book is already about fifty percent longer than the one before it and it feels like it. I was hoping that my next edit would be my last one, but I’m pretty sure it’s not going to be. And that’s okay. Now that I’ve had the revelations I’ve had, I know what I’m getting myself into. There’s a few more days left in this month and I think I’m going to use them to set up goals and plans for February so that I can get back in check. From my recollection, the beginning of the book needs the most work, however, I was adding in chapters in the middle part, so I’m really going to have to be selective when I get there. But I think it will be worth it.

In all fairness, I’m pretty over this book and this series at the moment. Do I want to see how it ends? Yes. Do I want to keep writing it? Also yes. Do I need a break from it for a while? Most definitely. And that’s okay. I’m excited to get into my next project, but I don’t want to get into it without finding some closure by giving the second book a good edit, or six, before I shelf it all for a while.

Finding Time To Write

Routine, routine, routine. How many times have I mentioned that routine is how I am successful? At least a million. Today at work there were some contractors in doing things and that totally threw off my routine. By the time I left my only thought was “well, I think I got everything done.” Maybe I did, maybe I didn’t. The nice thing about having a routine is that it saves you. You just know that you’ve done everything you’re supposed to. At my old job, one of the things I had to do was make sure all the doors were closed and locked before we closed. It was definitely a pain if you missed one because the sensor wouldn’t register and then you would have to go find the issue before you could set the alarm. But there, I had a routine. And if I got interrupted in the middle of checking the doors, even though I had set the alarm and everything was fine, I would wonder all night if I had missed something.

Basically, I like routine.

I’ve started getting up earlier in the morning to build a new routine. I’ve mentioned before that I really like it. It’s because it starts my day off right. I wake up, roll out of bed, grab some breakfast and then get right into editing my vlog. Usually, while that is exporting I make the thumbnail (which takes me like two minutes because I’m not about to waste an hour on it), and then write a blog post. But then I had a day where I was slow in the morning and I didn’t get a chance to do a post or even make my bed. Again, making my bed is a huge help in my routine and just in making me feel put together. I think I managed to post a blog later that day, but then it happened again. I think it’s partially because my vlogs have been a little bit longer than usual lately. See, when I wake up almost two hours earlier in the day, I tend to have more content. Rude. So I’ve been skipping blogs lately, even though I’ve committed myself to daily blogs.

Here’s the thing, though. I enjoy blogging. I love writing. And this is a great way for me to make sure I write daily, even if I’m not working on my book, and I think it’s important to write daily. The problem is, if I’m not actually working on my book, I often struggle to find something to write about. Honestly, a lot of my days are the same. I often wake up, edit a vlog, clean my room, go to work, come home, waste a lot of time despite my best efforts, tidy up again, and then go to sleep. Hahaha. BORING.

But when I’m writing, I get to share what I’m working on, even if it’s a little vague, and that’s awesome. I always think about this, but writing is pretty much one of the only things you can’t easily share what you’re working on. If you’re writing an album, you can share a single or two before the whole thing. You can preview it. If you’re looking to act, you can make skits and post them. If you’re an artist, you can share sneak peeks of your pieces. Yeah, it’s a lot harder to share your written work, without taking the time away from your big piece to write something else. I mean, I guess I could share my first chapter of my book, but it doesn’t feel right, especially when I have no idea when my book will appear, and I don’t think that’s fair. I did it to a friend who’s read the first book, when I took a picture of the first page of the second book and sent it to her. Mwahaha.

So anyway, what I’m trying to figure out is a new routine, or something. Maybe it means I need to wake up a little earlier in the morning to have time for blogging. Maybe it means I need to have a running list of topics that I’m good with talking about. That’s actually been one of my goals for the last two years. I haven’t done it very well. Alas. But we’ll see what I can do. I also think it means I need to make more time to write. And not just make the time and say I’m going to write, but actually sit down to write. I’m feeling more motivated lately to get back into it, and I have been slowly picking away at the few chapters I need to finish. I feel like January has just been a month of getting my ducks in a row and setting up routines for success, so I’m hoping the coming of a new month means that I’m all set up and good to get things sorted.

So that’s where we’re at. I need to keep up with my routines and figure out what I need to do if I don’t have enough time. And then I need to sit down and write. That would be good.

Am I Becoming An Adult?

I didn’t wake up at 6am today. I planned on it, but I didn’t. Well, I woke up at six and after a few crazy dreams I decided that I should sleep for another hour. I knew I didn’t have a ton of footage in to edit, so I knew I could get away without getting up super early. But then I turned off that alarm too and slept until just after nine. And I think that was okay.

I’m starting to realize that it’s important to make plans and decisions but also to be flexible in everything. It’s something I’ve started to learn this year, to the point that I made “growth” one of my words for the year. Last year I had three words that I wanted to focus on and I knew what they were right away. They were refresh, reset, and refocus. This year I knew that I wanted to wait and let the words come to me. And it’s crazy to think, but already this year I feel like I’ve had more light bulb and personal growth moments than I’ve had for a long time. Which is why that word has snaked it’s way in. I’m still looking for a few more words, but I think that’s a good one to start with.

Maybe I’m just maturing now. I’m coming into being an adult. A little delayed for sure, but better late then never, right? If that’s the case, and it’s me becoming an adult super late, it’s about time. But also it could be because of all the terrible mental health issues I’ve dealt with for over a decade and a half. It’s hard to get your life together when you’re just barely holding everything together. Maybe this means that my mental health is becoming stronger than it has been in a while. It was something I worked on for much of last year, but it did fall be the wayside when things went upside down. And it’s been on my list to work on this year, but I haven’t really sat down to work on some of the specific things I wrote on my goals. But I’ve been doing little things like pursuing things I enjoy; embroidering, reading, going for walks, etc. And I think those have made a big difference.

I’m also really enjoying my early wake ups and that, coupled with my new love of needlework, makes me believe I’m becoming an old lady. I’m good with it. I’ve always kind of looked forward to becoming an eccentric old lady. It’s been one of my goals for a while. Maybe I’m just getting there a little earlier than anticipated.

No matter what is going on, I’m learning to listen to myself and push when I need to push, and am able to, and relax or take my foot off the pedal when it’s a little too much. It’s insane to me that it’s taken this many years for me to get to this point, but at the same time, I’m glad I got here and I can only think it’s going to keep getting better. The only thing that would make life better now would be getting back on my writing grind. And I’m almost there. Not quite yet, but I can feel it.

A New Normal?

For four days in a row I worked at waking up at 6am. It was a struggle. I hated it because I love sleeping in. But I was also more productive than I had been in a while. Then I went puppy sitting and I made the decision to not continue. At least not for those two days. The first day,I slept in until 11:30am one day and had a nap with the puppers in the afternoon. The next day I decided I should try to get up a little earlier and rolled out of bed around 9:30. But that’s still over three hours after when I was getting up.

Last night I was a little late getting to bed because I had some work that needed to be done and I had to shower. It was probably about 11 o’clock by the time I slipped under the covers. And as I set my alarm for 6am the next day, I wondered if maybe I should just edit the vlog then and there and sleep in for another hour an a bit. I decided to risk it and just go to sleep, not knowing if I would actually wake up when I needed to and with time to edit the vlog.

I’m happy to report that I woke up at 6am like it was nothing. I dragged my feet a bit, but I was up and moving by 6:03, which I think is a record for me from the last couple tries. The vlog is edited, my thumbnail is ready to go, and it’s only 6:45. I’m impressed. And I’m only a little tired. Honestly, I’m surprised at how easy it was for me to get out of bed. I thought I would struggle a lot more. I thought I would hate everything. I didn’t even set an alarm between 6am and 7:20am when I normally get up for work because I had NO faith in myself that I would do it. But I did. And I’m okay with it.

I think I have to stress how much of a night owl I am for anyone else to appreciate how big of a deal this is. When I was in university I wouldn’t start my essays until 10pm on the night before they were due. 9pm was too early. I would actually just screw around waiting for it to be ten so I could start working. I would then write the essay between 10pm and 2 or 3am. At that point I would make a decision about my next step. If the class was early in the day, I would cite it then. If it was later in the day, I would go to sleep for a few hours and then cite it when I woke up. There were a few times where I accidentally pulled an all nighter because I realized it had gotten to the point where it was kind of stupid to go to sleep. Like I would be writing my fanfic or something and I would realize it was 5am and then I saw no point in sleep. Great life choices, I know. But night was when I preferred to be up and preferred to be creative. I always felt like, with everyone else asleep around me, that I could harness all the creativity and good ideas because no one else was awake to get them. Weird, maybe, but I felt like it worked.

Now, however, I’ve gotten better at planning and knowing where my story is going without having to rely on finding the midnight muses, so I don’t think I need to stay up super late anymore. That’s not saying I still won’t. Sometimes I just get into the zone and there is nothing that will stop me, even as the hours slip by. However, I’m enjoying this 6am wake up for now, so I think I’ll try to stick with it.

A Long Month

January has been an interesting month for me. And I know that, with a week left to go before the end of it, maybe I shouldn’t be reflecting on it just yet, but you know what? I’m gonna. Because I am grown woman and I can do what I want.

But seriously, I feel as if this month has gone on forever and ever, even though we’re just over three weeks into it. I think it’s had to do with the hype of a new year, of getting back into work, and of starting a new hobby. Also, I’ve been away from home puppy sitting, been moderately social, and tried to get out and be active. I think I lost that one, though, because the WEATHER! Wow! Even right now I think it’s raining. Just can’t win on that one. I also think my efforts to wake up early and be more productive had something to do with it all. I had a solid four days where I woke up at 6am and got stuff done on extended days. Then I went puppy sitting and said “SCREW IT!” and slept in a lot. I said it was because I didn’t want to disturb the puppers, and that was definitely a part of it, but I also think it was because I was alone and didn’t have to work, so chill time was great. And I ended up taking a nap on one of the days where I slept in, so honestly, I think I was just doomed from the start for that. I did really like the early wake ups, though, and I think I’m going to continue. I just need to keep adjusting when I go to sleep, when I eat, etc. I’ll get there, though.

This month has been a month of setting things up, and that is also a huge part of why it’s felt like the longest month in ages. I just feel like I’m ALWAYS doing something, which isn’t a bad thing because I hate when I’m not doing something, but it’s just felt like a lot. And I don’t want that. I still want to partake in downtime, so I think I should figure out a routine or a schedule. Honestly, it’s on my list of goals for 2020 to have a routine because I know I thrive well with one. It’s just a matter of sorting it all out and making it work for me. It certainly can’t be a rigid routine. It will have to be flexible, and probably include time for napping, because I do love me some nap times.

All in all, I think January has been a good start to the year for me. I’ve been setting myself up for success with a lot of goals (though definitely not all of them) and I’m been keeping on top of almost everything. I’m still excited for this year, which is a win, and I can’t wait to be more and more successful and productive as I make my way through the months. That being said, if this month already feels long, I fear for what the rest of the year will feel like.

Productive, But Struggling

It’s day four of my efforts to wake up early and today is the first morning that I actually got up at 6am when my first alarm clock went off. Okay, I didn’t immediately climb out of bed because I was being stubborn, but it was only a few minutes late today. I thought about snoozing until my next alarm, but the fear of not getting my vlog edited in time got me going. I shouldn’t have been concerned in all honesty, because it’s just 7am now and it’s almost finished exporting, but there was no way for me to know that. I did make my life a little easier by importing and rendering all the footage before I went to sleep, and that was super helpful.

I didn’t sleep the greatest last night, which kind of sucks, but I still slept longer than I often do when I work the next day, so that’s good. I will take it. And I think that, the more I go with these early morning wake ups, the easier it’ll be. I’m a little concerned that I might fall off the wagon because I’m puppy sitting for the next few days, and they are old puppers, so they’re lazy, which means they don’t get up at 6am and mostly they just nap during the day. In the past, especially when I don’t have to work, I’ve had very chill days with the pups and have napped a lot. So, we’ll see.

Yesterday, my intention was to combine my two chapter 16s together to make one, great chapter. Firstly, I needed to finish the chapter. It didn’t go well. I added 42 words to it, but didn’t quite get to where I wanted to be. Of course, I wasn’t exactly sure where I wanted to be, so that didn’t help. After staring at it for thirty or so minutes, I gave up and did something I really wanted to do.

It was this:

Aerial View of a Field

Okay, this piece was calling me to finish it, and with only so many hours in the day, I was not feeling writing when I was so close to the end of this.

I did spend some time laying in bed last night, as I tried to get to sleep, trying to figure out what the next step is. Part of the problem is that I need to double check my timeline because knowing what day of the month it is will b e very important. But again, and I know I’m mentioned this before, part of what has slowed me down here is that I’m not even sure I truly believe this chapter, and a few around it, belong in the story. I’m conflicted, though, so I think it’s best to add them in and then edit later. When I first looked at these chapters the other day and realized I stopped hating everything, I was excited to have those chapters in. Now, a day later, and I’m not so sure. But, I’ll keep pushing through and hope for the best. I’m always a fan of quantity to make quality, so I’ll just stick to that for now.

I Don’t Hate My Book!

I’ve been whining and moaning about my second book for some time now, but in all honesty, I haven’t sat down with it since the beginning of December. Well, I tried to read through it about a week ago and instead, I just skipped the majority of it. That’s bad, I know. But after spending several hours over the last few weeks playing video games and embroidering, I decided to take a look at it last night. Keep in mind, I’ve been waking up earlier each day in an effort to set a new routine, and so by the time I hit nine o’clock last night, I was struggling pretty hard. But I did still sit down with it.

And it turns out that I didn’t immediately hate everything. In fact, I kind of liked it. Which is a huge shift.

For months, I’ve been dreading really getting back into this edit, mostly because I have a few chapters I have to add in. Every time I’ve done an edit, I’ve added a little into the chapters, but mostly just skipped them, which is terrible. I justified it by saying that it’s a struggle to be editing and then switch focus to creating. Which, I actually think, is a legitimate problem. After my last full edit, I decided to hold off on another edit until I managed to fill in the gaps. I’ve been avoiding filling in the gaps.

Recently I decided to read the entire book through so I could get back into it, and like I mentioned, I skipped the majority on my way to the first gap. That gap was at chapter 16. Last night, I sat down and decided that I would at least read through it, if not do something. I started reading and here and there I was fixing thing. And what’s best was that I was enjoying it. This chapter that I had been dreading for so long wasn’t actually worth dreading. I made some changes, I felt good, and then I got to the end of the chapter and I was confused. Because I was certain I had written more than I had. I distinctly remembered more of that chapter, but I couldn’t remember if I had actually written it, or if I had just thought about it. I’ve done that before. I’ve written massive amounts of the story in my head while I’m laying in bed trying to sleep, or while I’m out, but not actually put the words down on paper, or computer. But I was pretty sure I had actually written these missing parts.

It was then that I remembered there was a document called “Chapter 16” on my desktop. Sure enough, I opened it and it was chapter 16, complete with the additions I had made. Even worse, I had already gone through and edited/reworked the beginning part of the chapter and it sounded a lot better than the additions I had just made. Whoops! I’m not that mad about it, honestly, I’m just happy that I’m getting back into it and not hating it. The plan for today is going to be to look at both chapters and make any necessary adjustments before absorbing the completed chapter into my book document, and I’m honestly excited to do it. I think I still have another chapter or two to add in that area, but then, assuming my notes are correct, I only have four more chapters between there and the end that either need to be added, or just need a really in depth look at. That’s promising. Maybe I can still get this done by the end of the month.